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Choose whether the other person really needs to know about the issue, and if yes, let the child decide who will tell them.

“Do you choose to tell (Mom) what happened, or choose for me to tell her with you there to make sure that I explain it correctly?

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Train yourself to say what you want them to do instead of what you don’t. Notice the common element is starting with the word “you” and then acknowledging what they worked at, rather than what you think about it.Either way, the child is allowed to express their thoughts or concerns and feel validated without an argument. First, it creates anxiety and fear in the child, especially of the person who you are going to tell about whatever happened.Second, it ignores your responsibility to deal with the issue at hand and passes it to someone else.Encouragement, and this phrase is arguably the most commonly spoken praise children hear. Instead of cutting off the conversation, you can say, “I know you want my answer to be different, but it will not change”.You can also train yourself to make sure the child fully understands your response, with “I just told you my answer. ” This allows the child to present their opinion or get clarification.